I'd like some patience please...NOW!

I'll be the first to admit, I'm not the most patient person.  It depends on what we're talking about too...I'm more patient with some things (and people) than others.  But let me tell you...the whole med school process--from the minute we submitted our first application--has tried my patience like nothing else.

So much waiting....are we going to get secondary applications?.....Are we going to get interviews?....Are we getting accepted to a school?......Whew, okay we got into a school.  Now there is more waiting....how will we do on boards?.....Where will we apply for residency?......Where will we get interviews?.....Where will we get in?....and it goes on and on.  And it just seems like one big waiting game for me.

I've decided that med school lesson #26 (who's counting?) is:

The better I get at being patient, the happier I will be.

This thought was reinforced at church today as we discussed Dieter F. Uchtdorf's teachings about patience.  Here are some of my favorite quotes from what he said (and you don't have to go to my church to feel inspired by just how true these thoughts feel).  You can view the whole thing here.  It is amazing.


"Patience--the ability to put our desires on hold for a time--is a precious and rare virtue.  We want what we want and we want it now.  Therefore, the very idea of patience may seem unpleasant and, at times, bitter."

"Patience is a purifying process that refines understanding, deepens happiness, focuses action, and offers hope for peace."

"Patience requires actively working toward worthwhile goals and not getting discouraged when results don't appear instantly or without effort."

"Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well!"

"Often we can't see the Lord's hand in our lives until long after the trials have passed.  Often the most difficult times in our lives are essential building blocks that form the foundation of our character and pave the way for future opportunity, understanding, and happiness."

"Patience means accepting that which cannot be changed and facing it with courage, grace, and faith."

Man, that last one especially hits me hard.  Accept what I cannot change.  The road to becoming a doctor is long, and I feel like I anxiously (and sometimes impatiently) await the next milestone and phase.

I feel like I even have more patience with my 1 year old than with the doctor process!  (And this is saying a lot especially since he recently learned how to open and close the dishwasher, and when we flip the latch to lock it so he won't open it and gouge himself with forks and knives, he's learned to twist the knob exactly right to actually TURN ON the dishwasher.  We have very clean dishes, my friends.)

I think I have less patience with the med school process because I have a lot less control over it.  Part of this whole process is learning how to have patience while accepting the fact that much of our future is largely out of our control.  (For example, our 5 year plan?  Uh, we don't know.....move where ever we get into residency!)

I'm hoping that by blogging about all this, I can remember it on the inevitable days when I want things to get easier instantly or without effort.  I'll have to look back and remind myself that the better I become at being patient, the happier I will be!


BakerGirl said...

Patience is SO hard when you're in the middle of medical school! 3rd and 4th year were the most trying on my patience. I really wish they would redesign the system to take some stress off the families. Announce Matches earlier, give us more than 3 months to figure out the moving situation!!! By the time my husband and I found an apartment in NY we didn't have time to settle in together...I had to do everything because his residency kicked off July 1st which was the Monday after we moved in. (We moved in on Saturday...Yes, we had 2 days to do most of the heavy moving/unpacking.)

Until they do change something, you just have to surround yourself with family and friends who will distract you from all those unknowns! It's overwhelming when you start thinking about. I remember thinking about interviews, match day and moving and feeling like I was drowning in unknowns. Not fun. Breathe, get out and about and find people who want to discuss things other than interviews and Match!! For awhile I had to limit my hang outs with other medical school gf's and wives...We would just start talking and then the conversation would quickly become overwhelming.

I really found solace in my friends who weren't attached to medical school in anyway. They took my mind out of my world and gave me other things to think/talk about.

Keely said...

Hey Lady- This one is a daily battle for me. We're only in the second year and I constantly find myself day dreaming about where residency is going to take us, where kids will finally fit into the picture, and when we will be the ones in charge of our lives. All of these things are so exciting, but they feel so far away.I really wish I could enjoy reaching a milestone before I jump in to the countdown until the next. But it's just my nature, and obviously yours, too.

Lucky for you, you didn't have to wait to start a family. So try this on for size...you may want the next 4 years of medical school to fly by...but I'm sure you don't want the first 4-5 years of his life gone in an instant. Soak that little guy up...every little thing...and I'm sure this time will fly by, you may even find yourself hoping for it to slow down :0)

Sorry...I get corney in the morning.

And when that doesn't work...you should blog and commiserate with the rest of us impatient ladies who feel your pain.

Thanks for the quotes!!! I'll have to refer back on a daily basis.

Sarah Marie said...

Such a good post. And Keely's right on the money.

Sometimes I feel like I'm spending my life waiting. Gotta remember to soak it in. Relish it. Remember, "there is a time for everything."


Kensi said...

I think all med student's wives and moms struggle with patience. I'm beginning to think it will be a life long battle!

lifeofadoctorswife said...

So hard to be patient!! And I think you're absolutely right - it's extra difficult because we have no control over whether they get interviews... or second interviews... or match somewhere... or where we match. It's so hard to have your whole life decided by someone else, without your input!

But I think reading those quotes it a good starting point. You guys WILL get through it!

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